Who Huan? Who Asking?

Huan Says:
Luke Perry ruin Huan chances with Jenni Garth

Many people they say who Huan? What your story? Why you hate marshmallow so much?

I figure while Peking (that my homunculus name thank you dougiefresh) does cleaning in stock room I take time to give you low down on me.

I no know my parents I was left on doorstep as baby and taken in by wise Master Fong.

Master Fong he raise me and give me work in shop. One day when I was young I say me want to be star like william shatner on TV - you may know him from hit tv series TJ Hooker. He do other stuff... I don't know... who care when he TJ Hooker!!!

Anyway I go and try out for big movie Indiana Jones and Temple of Reasonable Danger (it later change to Temple of Doom - better title I don't know). I go for role of Short Round who was little american boy, they look me and go hey asian kid much better. I laugh and cry all at same time but then other kid come in and take role from Huan.

Huan very angry and turn to dark arts. I paint in poor lit room and hurt eyes till me get headache. Then me turn to occult.

I try out for film called goonies and once again get told that Huan no right for role - sloth seem good role but who care!

I then get recurring role on 90210 but have all scene cut because I spill drink on Luke Perry and he vengeful.

It ok cause I then get recurring role on Melrose but once again fortune not shine on Huan as for some reason every scene I blocked by pot plant. I only non major actor appear on every episode but not seen once!

Occult be good to Huan I conjure up all manner of scary. But one day it all go major wrong and me turn into bigfoot and have to hide in mountains.

Master Fong he find me and turn me back into Huan which plenty good for Huan and then he give me old job back and clean shop now.

Very excited time for Huan as I now even have email address that you can write to Huan!!!! It huantheshopboy@gmail.com - you write I may write back... then you may write back again and we keep in touch.

Next I must get on Myspace and get lot of online friends.

Ahhh Huan talk too long... plenty work to do have to unpack box of mothman eyeballs, they glow in dark make nice addition to xmas decoration...

You buy one now?

1 Comment:

Doctor Fong said...

You have had a tough life, Huan. Know that you will always have a home at the House of Mysteries.