Interocitors just lead to trouble!

Prof Brad Says:
"But where can you find a hat for that noggin?"

Howdy there Dr Fong readers!

Today I'd like to address a concern I have about you scientists out there building any old device that the plans for mysteriously land in your lap.

Have some restraint good man!

Just because some stranger happens to give you the blueprints to build an incredibly complex and advanced communications device doesn't mean you should!

You're building, and experimenting and then BAM! You've got mutants running around with claws for hands and giant heads with brains popping out all over the place.

Oh you may think it's cool but let me wave my pipe in your general direction in a non approving way. In fact I'll take it one step further with a stern frowning.

Mankind isn't ready for a bunch of Metalunan aliens relocating to Earth we have enough problems as it is with boy bands who may or may not be from other planets. But if you start letting the Metalunans in then you'll have a Mu-tant problem. I don't trust any species that can't wear hats or gloves.

Military Tactics Lesson #1: Trojan Horses

Dr. Fong Says:
You just can't fool those Turks twice.

"Can we just leave this here for the night?"

"What a thing was this, too, which that mighty man [Odysseus] came up with this great plan wrought and endured in the carven horse, wherein all we chiefs of the Argives were sitting, bearing to the Trojans death and fate!"

"But come now, change thy theme, and sing of the building of the horse of wood, which Epeius made with Athena's help, the horse which once Odysseus led up into the citadel as a thing of guile, when he had filled it with the men who sacked Ilium."

Straight From The Fridge, Dad

Prof Brad Says:
"Ha ha ha you fools!"

Yes thank you to the good Dr Fong for giving me the avenue to slip some heavy subjects on to you kids from time to time.

Now I understand you kids have your iPods and your mini diskette players and think that technology is hip and cool and indeed your friend.

If only that were true my young friends. It is the sad truth that your science and technology machines can very easily be perverted by blighters. Of course the threat to men doesn't just come from those on the wrong tracks chums!

Oh no, very few people would have imagined that our planet Earth is being watched across the infinite of space by envious eyes. Today I wish to alert you to a threat that is of grave concern and those with delicate dispositions should look away now to avoid a public display.

I speak of the Ro-Man.

Yes this nasty piece of work comes from outer space and is directed by the Great Guidance. To you and I his equipment appears to be little more than a dresser with a television screen. But do not underestimate he and his Calcinator Death Ray!!!

How ironic that science is the very tool to beat this scientific robot monster. Antibiotics developed by key Professors have proven to be effective against the fiends horrible Calcinator Death Ray. So do not delay, go and see your closest professor and get yourself immunised so that you too can protect our women and children from this threat from outer space!

The Weirdest Postcards in the World

Dr. Fong Says:
As everyone knows, Dr. Fong loves old postcards!

Dr. Fong's House of Mysteries is very excited to have just acquired a large collection of extremely strange antique postcards. I think these will be an excellent source of vintage strangeness that I will be a great addition to the weirdness that has already been going on here for over a year.

These aren't your regular "weird" postcards (ie larger than life corn on a railroad car) these are a cut or two above the average. We are talking about spirit photography, old monster sightings, circus related, strange animals, and some that are quite macabre and spooky.

These postcards will all be for sale on postcards here at Dr. Fong's House of Mysteries. It is your chance to own a strange piece of history. To see the postcards we have for sale click the tab that says "Weird Postcards" in the menu at the top of the page. Or click it in the tags at the bottom of this post.

I'm not sure how long it will take to get all of these amazing postcards listed here (years most likely) but every once in a while I will pull some out from the vaults and share them with you.

The Night of the Krampus

Dr. Fong Says:
The Krampus only checks his list once.

Oh! You better watch out,
You better not cry,
You better not pout,
I'm telling you why:

the Krampus is coming to town
to torture your children!

In some European countries Santa Claus doesn't have to do all the work by himself. Santa's only job is rewarding nice children. The naughty children get a visit from something far more hideous, the Krampus.

The Krampus is depicted as a horned, shaggy, bestial, and demonic creature. In many depictions the Krampus looks like popular images of the Devil, complete with red skin, cloven hooves, and short horns.

When the Krampus visits your house you don't get any presents. The Krampus comes with switches and is a tormentor of naughty children. He may simply leave a lump of coal as a warning for them to shape up, or if the children have been especially wicked, the Krampus may tie them up with chains and whip them with switches.

Because of the Krampus Christmas Eve became known as the time when children were best behaved.

Custom Creature Taxidermy Is Amazing!

Dr. Fong Says:
It could be the best place ever.

If I had lots of extra money to spend I would go buy every single thing for sale at Custom Creature Taxidermy.

This place is simply amazing. Need a two-headed duck under a glass dome? Sure. Unicorns and flying cats? No problem. Mutant chickens with too many arms? Anytime.

Go check this out right now!

Custom Creature Taxidermy

The Practice of Headhunting

Dr. Fong Says:
They take out the skull, sew the eyes shut and boil them with tannins to preserve them.

Know Your Shrunken Heads...

1. This one looks like a local boy.

2. That's a monkey.

3. This one could be an explorer, but I'm betting it was a missionary.

"The Shuar in Amazonian Ecuador and Peru practiced headhunting in order to make shrunken heads and use them for ritual purposes."

Headhunting Wiki

On the subject of Mogwai

Dr. Fong Says:
Don't worry they are very rare and only eat children when they are really hungry.

"Mogwai are a breed of fairie folk found in Oriental lands. They reproduce sexually during mating season, triggered by the coming of rain.

"Most depictions show mogwai as child-sized humanoids, though their bodies are often more like those of monkeys or frogs than human beings. Some descriptions say their faces are apelike, while others show them with beaked visages more like those of tortoises or with duck beaks."

"Mogwai are mischievous troublemakers. Their pranks range from the relatively innocent, such as loudly passing gas, to the more troublesome, such as stealing crops, kidnapping children, or raping women. In fact, small children are one of the gluttonous mogwai's favorite meals, though they will eat adults as well."

Demon Face Appears on Oven Tray

Dr. Fong Says:
Your house is filled with demons. You must run for your lives!

"Above is a bizarre one from Chris and Jean in Manchester, England and here's what they say - "I have just been browsing the internet to try and find somewhere I could post some pictures that were taken on Saturday 02 Sep 2006."

"Please let me explain, my wife and I got a Chinese take away on Saturday afternoon to have later in the evening. We put part of the meal onto an oven tray that has been covered in tin foil. Once we had finished the meal I took off the foil to wash the dish and found the following image on the dish.

"We have not got any idea who the image is, or how and why it appeared on our dish. Please let us know if anybody has any ideas."

Mystical Blaze

Mystery of the Ancient Demon Skulls

Dr. Fong Says:
Can you find my Demon Skulls?

"Human skulls with horns were discovered in a burial mound at Sayre, Bradford County, Pennsylvania, in the 1880's. Horny projections extended two inches above the eye-brows, and the skeletons were seven feet tall, but other than that were anatomically normal."

"It was estimated that the bodies had been buried around A.D. 1200. The find was made by two professors, A.B. Skinner, of the American Investigating Museum, and W.K.Morehead, of Phillips Academy, Andover, Massachusetts. The bones were sent to the American Investigating Museum in Philadelphia, where they were later claimed to have been stolen and have never been seen again"

"Moloch & Friends" Album Released Today

Dr. Fong Says:
Give some of the sample tracks a listen and let us know what you think.

The new album "Moloch & Friends" is now available at our store. It has 14 tracks and sells for only $8.99. It is full of really great stuff. There are lots of sample tracks that you can listen to at the store.

Moloch & Friends Track Listing

1 Snake Osiris
2 Troubles of Macon Dr. Fong & Osiris
3 Fear Osiris
4 Summer Camp (at Bohemian Grove) Dr. Fong
5 The Reverend DJ Sco Moe
6 Rambling Insanity - the Deep Ones Osiris
7 March of the Daleks Dr. Fong
8 Reptile-Humanoids Osiris
9 Theme from "Dr. Fong: Vision Quest" Dr. Fong
10 Silent as a Stone Osiris
11 Grave Danger Osiris
12 Summer of 2007 Dogman Remix Dr. Fong & Osiris
13 Dwell Deep Ones Osiris
14 Reptile-Humanoid Shocker

Listen to the new CD

Golden Tablets of Mysterious Origin

Dr. Fong Says:
Even I have been unable to decipher their cryptic writings.

I am fascinated by these golden tablets. Their pseudo-Egyptian writings intrigue me and I have been unable to translate even a single word. These appear to be something like the plates found by Joeseph Smith in 1827. His plates were described as:

"...engraven on plates which had the appearance of gold, each plate was six inches [150 mm] wide and eight inches [200 mm] long and not quite so thick as common tin. They were filled with engravings, in Egyptian characters, and bound together in a volume, as the leaves of a book with three rings running through the whole. The volume was something near six inches [150 mm] in thickness, a part of which was sealed."

Golden Plates

Dr. Fong's House of Mysteries

Dr. Fong Says:
Drop by sometime.

The House of Mysteries has been run by my family for generations. Though the location of our establishment is given out on a confidential basis, if you happen to find it yourself you will, of course, be invited in graciously.

We specialize in finding strange and often dangerous items for our customers. There are also many rare and wonderful items on our shelves for sale or trade. The House of Mysteries stocks a wide variety of rare herbs and incenses as well as many antique and specialty items.

We are always buying new and interesting curios.

Moloch Cults in Northern Michigan

Dr. Fong Says:
There's dirty work afoot.

There have been suspicious activities taking place in the deep forests of northern Michigan for some time now. There have been a lot of animals disappearing around Benzie County and people have been reporting lights in the forests and strange noises echoing through the trees.

Most people think that the many strange occurences are unrelated but now possibility of a Moloch worshiping cult in the area brings them all into eerie focus.

More to follow shortly...

Octopus Sex? (NSFW)

Dr. Fong Says:

I know a lot of you don't want to hear this, but it's time to talk frankly about Octopus Sex. Over the past couple of weeks I have been seeing Octopus Sex
everywhere. Before then I had never even heard of this strange subject.

It all started with finding the above image in a box of cards.
Where did this image come from and why? I had to know more. I knew that I was entering a dangerous place on the Internet. Typing "Octopus Sex" into Google image search is not for squeamish. Most of what I saw seemed to come from Japan.

With just a couple clicks I had entered a world unlike any I had ever seen before. In the frightening description of one movie, "all the waving cupped tentacles you could ever want walking over a nude, beautiful young woman". Oh my god, I don't ever want any! Get me out of here! Why do I know about this!?

Wiki - If You Dare

For your viewing pleasure?

Summer Camp (at Bohemian Grove) - Teaser Track from Moloch & Friends

Dr. Fong Says:
I made this song. I hope you enjoy it!

"This is another teaser track from our upcoming CD, Moloch & Friends."

"This song is called Summer Camp (at Bohemian Grove) and it tells the story of the Bohemian Grove out in California through the eyes of David Icke and Arizona Wilder. These two think the the world is secretly run by shapeshifting reptiles from space who need to drink human blood in order to maintain human form."

"People who go to the Bohemian Grove worship a giant 40 foot stone owl... for some reason."

The Hand of Glory

Dr. Fong Says:
Only a few of these are known to have survived to the present day. A true rarity!

Here we have something really special. The Hand of Glory is the dried and pickled hand of a man who has been hanged, often specified as being the left hand, or else, if the man was hanged for murder, the hand that did the deed.

According to old European beliefs, a candle was made with the fat of one who had died on the gallows, virgin wax, and Lapland sesame oil, this was combined with a hand having come from a hanged criminal. Once it was lit it would have rendered motionless all persons to whom it was presented. The Hand of Glory also purportedly had the power to unlock any door it came across. Because of this the Hand was sometimes used by burglars to rob houses.

Nazi UFO Secrets - Stories from New Swabia Antarctica

Dr. Fong Says:
Pfff, I hate Antarctican Nazis.

"Through the years there have been many spectacular claims about the Vril Society of Berlin. Some say the society had made contact with an alien race at the beginning of World War II and dedicated itself to creating spacecraft to reach the aliens. In partnership with the Thule Society and the Nazi Party, it developed a series of flying disc prototypes. With the Nazi defeat, the society allegedly retreated to a base in Antarctica and vanished."

"One esoteric Hitlerist legend recounts that Adolf Hitler did not commit suicide in 1945, but fled to Argentina, then to an SS base under the ice in New Swabia Antarctica during the early 1950s where he began plotting his revenge against mankind. This legend predicts that Hitler would lead a fleet of UFOs from the base to establish the Fourth Reich."

79 stolen garden gnomes discovered in central France

Dr. Fong Says:
It is about time someone started standing up for our small forest brothers. They have been enslaved for far too long! Viva la Revolution!

"Some 79 garden gnomes snatched by a so-called gnome liberation group, were discovered Wednesday along the banks of a stream in the central Limousin region, police said."

"The gnomes were hidden in some underbrush with a banner that read, "gnome mistreated, gnome liberated", police said."

"Last month 86 gnomes were found in the yard of a Limoges high school. Others, stolen last summer, were discovered along the edge of a swimming pool on the outskirts of the city."

Link to the original article
Garden Gnome Liberation Front

Tasteless Halloween: Steve Irwin with Stingray Wound and Dangling Baby

Dr. Fong Says:

"We did Halloween in Elberta, Michigan this year. Boy did we have a great time! Our annual award for most tasteless costume was a no brainer this year."

"Our good buddy Tom showed up at the Halloween party dressed as Steve Irwin the Crocodile Hunter complete with bloody stingray wound and his very own baby to dangle."

"Too Soon?"